Sobriety was something I had previously thought to be unattainable; the anxiety of life too much to bear without substance, without alcohol. I needed it for almost anything and usually there was no stopping me from obtaining it; and always wanting more. A vicious cycle of dependence which could not be broken. Thank god I was wrong.
I am currently 8 months sober and the benefits have reached and blessed every aspect of life. I have less anxiety, less illnesses, less arguments, less confusion, less injury, less financial burdens and I could go on forever. Most importantly I have accepted buddha and my sobriety go hand in hand on this path that I have chosen.
There are so many ways to conquer demons of which used to control my life. Im finding myself in meditation everywhere I go and every day that I stay. It is very important for my day to day balance to practice the teachings of various meditations and perhaps my writings can lead others to finding a healthier balance in life regardless of religious belief or path.
Thats all for now.
Its been a very long time since I have been away from WordPress. Id like to come back to this and reintroduce myself. My name is Nina and I’m 31 years old. Im a Buddhist, a step mother, an artist and a trans woman. I started this blog while living in a homeless shelter many years ago and I can remember walking across the street to the coffee shop to do my daily blogging every morning. I had originally thought i would simply write about living on the streets, but. It became much more than that.
Im returning now as many things have changed. I got married and am looking after a young one. I am sober. For the first time in my life. Something like 8 or 9 months. It has been easy but it hasn’t. I am very thankful for this morning; an opportunity to speak and place another step on this path. The path of buddha, sobriety, motherhood, art and most importantly love.
Im not sure where to begin but I suppose I already have. So since I have been gone; budhism has truly become my path. I have realized there is no place for alcohol in a buddhist. I see the dhamma now as the only path to be on. I am also a visual artist. A graffiti writer and painter. I am shocked and happy to say that art is my profession yet am still but what you would call the starving artist. But I am happy.
Sobriety was taken away from me by the age of 13. So 17 years of usage which is more than half of my life and pretty much the entirety of my adult life. I have found new ways to enjoy life, to cope with pain and anxiety. As i write i feel like the lotus blooming from the mud.
Hello everyone. Im here again. Im back
Walking this path I count my steps
Carefully count my breaths
Walking straight and mindful
Vowing to bring fourth kindness
Drawing another breath I focuss
The simple motions
Eliminating negative emotions
Om nami padme hum
Loving living lotus compassion
Grant me the needed wisdom to encapsul
So i may bring joy while my steps
Carefully counting every breath
May peace spread across the globe
As simple as to eyes to see and hands to hold
May light illuminate the dark
Revealing truth and love within our hearts
May the sick be healed and blind can see
There is no pain; for you nor me
May the lost be found; in this crazy world
Rise up like the lotus
Help to cultivate the good.
I see the words along the page
As eyes watch my words
Words describing themselves
I’m inscribing myself
Depraved of my enlightenment
Perhaps if my ego is forgiven me n no longer lives in me
More mindful kindness handfuls of love to remind us
Of compassion as we face life’s lashes
I have been reborn over and over but… This time is different I’ve never been sober for this long; decades of relentless; alcohol dependence
The days are in the hundreds; gather abundance; knowledge. Confront my fears try to be humble and acknowledge.
Keep focus; meditation half lotus. Buddha quotes rewrote them post them. Try to be open.
Lessons learned; a great deal. I wait still. Time stands still. The virtue of patience.
As I await, awake here.