Soul rebels… Street art and skateboarding…

Skart

Designed rhymes.

We need to revitalize minds, open your eyes wide.

Dont be surprised as the disguised come alive.

Cognitive dissonance, we are a kin to this.

Systematic trafficked like smuggled immigrants.

If you visualize a better day, to find a better way.

Maybe we can all make it, roads paved to take the pain away.

Me? I dont claim ten toes on the pavement.

Tired of arraignment, drugs and alcohol leaving me displaced here.

Struck a new cord, cultivate in life’s prison and build myself a new ward.

So this is my world. I design her.

She is beautiful, she is fine, She is my girl.

Sermon of the alleys…

A seemingly average day

A trans girl with long dirty blonde hair smokes in the west end alley

The hot summer air and a cool breeze is calming…

A man turns the corner on foot and he is talking to himself,

She is unsure about what

He is surprised the alley isn’t empty…

“Oh you caught me talking to myself!”. He exclaims happily

“Haha”

She laughs

“I do the same thing”.

He thinks to himself for a moment and says

“The world needs a sermon!”.

As he disappears

Strolling down the lane

On a hot summers day…

2 Years Sober

Today I celebrate 2 years drug and alcohol free.

My poison of choice is alcohol. But I have indulged in everything I could get my hands on.

Drinking for many and every reason.

I didnt attend any meetings or have a counsellor of any sort. I rely on my friends and family to talk to when life throws me curveballs and I’m forever thankful for that.

A big part of my sobriety is very simple. I have housing. I am a success story for providing people with addiction and mental health issues affordable housing.

Once I had my housing I was sober in weeks. I had one relapse. But I quickly got back on track and here we are!

Thanks for reading.

-Nina

Vancity Summer Rain

I cannot remember how long its been

Hot summer days, scorching the earth

But this morning brings change

Rain descends from sky

I open my eyes from a dream state

Awake as the pouring ensues

Happiness as all the trees celebrate

Life anew, life continues…

The falling of the rain

…

Photo Credit: TriTronThedark

Ramble. July 28. 2024

Tired for the past couple of days… Not sure why… But I am getting by just fine. As my apartment is spotless and kitchen is full of food. Spending much time browsing online, chatting and digital window shopping… Talking to my friends… Some are doing well and others are not.

Therefor I am thankful for creators… or universes bountiful blessings bestowed upon my life. I think of all I have to be thankful for on more than a daily basis. I do my best to help and create good in the world. Perhaps good karma… Also many people have helped me along the way and sometimes… Its just your turn to help.

I wish there was more I could do but I have many obstacles currently. I have spoken on some of them before. But I have basically chosen sobriety and solitude over everything in life.

Thank you for serenity, bountifulness, sobriety and peace.

Good morning

I arise feeling wonderful. A large dose of eddibles will do that. I was slingshotted out of state and into a deep sleep. Immediately thinking of those Ive lost along the way this morning. House parties in mansions an escape from the slums and troubled times along with. But that is alright for their memories will always bring me comfort and joy. Knowing we truly lived this life.

Today I will probably escape my agoraphobia and live some more; for that is what is planned. The summer has been good. Counting down the days to 2 years alcohol free. Sober if you don’t count cannibus. What do I want to do today? I do not know. It does not matter. Today will be a good day.

Ramble Journal – June 7 2004

Damn the sun shines bright, The warmth is soothing. Peace… Until the later of the day. But we shall see. Thank god I got AC!

So far this morning Ive been emotional. I am an easily triggered girl lol. I always want to see the best in people but sometimes they make it difficult.

Most of my anxiety stems from self. I actually usually put the entire planet on a pedastal above me for the most part. And for some reason… I am worth nothing. I stay sober… I try to make changes for the better. Im trying to heal and rebuild myself. Strengthen my heart and soul.

Its a work in progress.

Anyway if you’re reading this Im sorry for wasting your time. I do this blog for my own therapy lol

-Nina

Mindless jot… escapism

I dont really feel quite myself at the moment as my heart thump thump thumps

Not quite as relaxing

I must somehow enjoy the rest of this beautiful day…

Now what can be dont besides mindless relaxation… Art perhaps? Cleaning? Youve been meaning to clean out the boxes in the entrance closets but THAT REQUIRES GOING OUTSIDE.

And no one wants that.

Lol…

Games? I seem tired of games. Maybe if I pick it up and start playing I will enjoy it. Or maybe not. Maybe I am depressed.

As I sip this coffee. Well… Guzzle this coffee… It does not seem to help the heart slow down. Neither did the ganja either. When will I ever learn…

But I can’t help it. These are my acts of escapism.

I may not be drinking or sniffing lines popping pills but I am still a junkie by all means. What does that mean? It means Im a dopamine fiend. Squeez it to the last drop.

Humble Jot dot.

Just jotting… Need to get in the habit of writing more.

Take your time to unwind from the troubles and trials

Trials and tribulations as we all are awakened

Building blocks of cornerstones unknown

Remove self from the throne

There is no self at all

Nothing to own, control, condone

Alone on ya own

How we supposed to grow

Nina